My Horoscope

From the Missaukee Sentinel, Friday, February 13, 2009:

PISCES - Feb 19/Mar 20
You're feeling eccentric and could surprise everyone with your antics. Cool down or you may alienate others who are middle of the road.

This makes me laugh; a lot!

If I might alienate others who are middle of the road, what will I do to those who are squarely on the far-right side of the road? Let me try and see...

I also think it's funny that the Missaukee Sentinel has a horoscope column. Why? You might ask, and I might tell you this:

I've noticed that there is a fair amount of Christian posturing around this county including a fair amount of intolerance. Christianity is neatly ladled into nearly everything around these parts and I never miss a cursory glance at the fabulous Missaukee Area Church Directory featured in the Sentinel and who could miss the listing of area churches as you roll into Lake City. It's always nice to know where you can go for salvation. Ah, yes, even our children get a fair amount of it, even in our public schools (that's a no-no sayeth the Supreme Court). So, I've heard it before, probably from my Pentacostal preacher grandpa, that horoscopes should not be read by Christians. A quick and cursory search of the web produced this:

Question: "Should a Christian consult horoscopes?"

Answer: The purpose of a horoscope is to gain insight into a person’s character and foretell the future. The basic belief of astrology is that planets and stars exert an influence upon our lives. Those with special knowledge—astrologers—can predict events in a person’s life. It is distressing that most major newspapers have a horoscope column, and even more distressing that many Christians read their horoscopes.

The Bible expressly forbids divination, sorcery, and hidden arts (Deuteronomy 18:10-14). God’s people are to heed God only (Deuteronomy 18:15). Any other source of guidance, information, or revelation is to be rejected outright. (See also Acts 16:16-18.) The Bible points to Jesus Christ as the only proper focus of faith (Acts 4:12; Hebrews 12:2). Our trust is in God alone, and we know that He will direct our paths (Proverbs 3:5-6). Faith in anything besides God is misplaced.

Astrology, then, opposes biblical teaching in at least two ways: it advocates faith in something other than God, and it is a form of divination. We cannot determine God's will for our lives through horoscopes. As Christians, we are to read the Bible and pray to God in order to gain wisdom and guidance. Consulting a horoscope is a violation of God's means of communicating with His children. We strongly believe that horoscopes should be rejected by Christians.

So, perhaps, if I've managed to alienate you, you can consider writing a nice letter to the Missaukee Sentinel about how the horoscope feature is un-Christian and should be removed immediately.

Hey! Did you know that the stimulus bill is anti-religious? That's what Huckabee said...